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Trumpers are Back!
So its officcial, the most presidential team ever on Mootlands and Blood Bowl history is going to attend the Spike Magazine and try to defy the laws of Bloodbowl by winning on its third season playing. Here is what their head Coach had to say:
“We are going to make Mootland great again, in fact a lot of people say we already have. And it’s the best people really. The best people!”
In addition it's been reported that they are also attending the Ulthuan Invitational Elimination Cup! More on this on later (fake)news.
A team we love to hate
As part of our team presentation its time now to give you all an indepth presentation one of the underdog of the seasons, the Trumpers. Known for its controversial players and high casualty count is the most unpredictable team of the league.
As you may remember it rose quickly to fame with The Wall and The Swamp gaining momentum and blocking abilities. The pair of trees made everyone on the left cringe everytime they entered the arena.
Of course the team has had it fair share of dead players as Lock H Up, China Jobs and who can forget the gruesome death of Muslim Ban. Other players have found themselves forced to retire due to injuries : Alt Facts, Mini Hands and Trump Care. Noteworthy players:
- The power couple Birther & MAGA, hard to hit and hard to get past. Side step and Diving Tackle makes this couple an early target in every game.
- Whit E. Supre, fast player(for a fling) that never stops running.
With a solid foundation of training and a rabid fan base some say there may be a chance they pull this off. Or not. Only time will tell folks.
Spike Magazine First game
First game against Trumpers are the notorious Atrocity Horrors! Trumpers will have to get creative if they want to avoid that savage werewolf known as Bernard de Cujo. Fast and agile as a gutterrunner and able to take down big preys with its claws.
On the other hand Both Puggy and Deeproot have agreed to sign up for the game!
We asked the coach to comment the common belief that Atrocity Horros will win the game:
- "The media is—really, the word, I think one of the greatest of all terms I've come up with—is fake. I guess other people have used it perhaps over the years, but I've never noticed it."
Well people coming up next will the review of the game between Atrocity Horrors and Trumpers.
Stay Tuned.
Finally the game is over and the Trumpers must be pleased to at least have survived the game. It certainly looked more even that the 0-2 final scores shows with a couple of plays that took the Horror by surprise!
The whole stadium was murmuring when they saw DeepRoot of all people(?) starting in the reserves. Only to later be quickly be thrown in a "Last Minute Substitution" with the rookie Mr Bannon that had taken Deeproots usually place at the LoS. To the Horros dismay that had planned a slugfest on Mr Bannon found themselvel looking up on the face of the strongest player out there. You could even say that this lead to an unexpected chance for The Wall(T) to pounce on the ball carrying Bernard De Cujo(W) but to the dismay of the Trumpers fans Bernard was able to get away and score shortly after. ALthough not before The Wall managed to completely dismantle the golem Karlos Klunk.
The offense of Trumpers looked quite promising until the ball cloned it selfed. Amisdt the confusion Horrors was able to take decimate the fling team to such degree that the 0-2 was all but inevitable.
This is what the Trumpers Coach has to say about the loss: "The game is absolutely being rigged by the dishonest and distorted media pushing Crooked Horrors - but also at many polling places - SAD"
Is this all we can expect from the boasting Trumpers?
Well no! we can expect more things since I just got a report of The Wall being on an intensive training camp with Steelhelms Emporium. He will probably miss the next game but we look forward to see the new and improved Wall when he enter the field again. And Todays stadium has also been bought by the Trumpers immediatly changing the name of it to Moot-A-Lago. This is a Stadium with a reputation for Spectacle so you can be sure tha win or lose, games played here will be worth to watch!
Trumpers vs Averland Iron BadgersSpike Tounament
THis game was expected to be a no brainer for the human team from Averland. With their now legendary thrower Dieter Ironbadge present and a couple of fling hunters in shape of the blitzers Herman and Franz Ironbadge this should have been a walk in the park. and it almost was.
There was no surprises in the firs half. AIB broke through a feeble defence line made by the flings and their bomber managed to beutrilized the three trees putting them on their backs or else getting rooted. As you may already know The Wall couldn't assist in this game but both Deeproot and a merc treeman joined. And it was still not enough. Not even the wildly unexpected inteception by Covfefe made any difference since he went straight down when trying te get to the treeline.
AIBs attempt to stall in order to incapacitate the Trumpers didn't really paid of since they apparently were wearing padded gloves today. So at the last turn AIB scores and Trumpers fields a full team for the last turn of the first half.
As expected they set up for the OTTTMTD. But AIB is surprisingly not set up to interfere with it. instead they rely on their kicke to deliver the ball out of reach from the flings. Instead it becomes a kickback, the rookie Fury manages to land and the tie is a fact.
the second half saw a Puggy carrying the ball forward in a very stable way. Unfortunally for the Trumpers the AIBs twin fling hunters thinned out the numbers that Puggy felt compelled to run by the sidelines with the ball protected by Mike Pence and Fire. At that point it looked that nothing was going to stop the 2-1 untill somehow Jens Ironbadge LEAPS in and cowd surfs Puggy.
To make a long story short, the remaining trees tried to make it hard to get the ball down but the already amazing thrower Dieter picked up the ball and passed it to the waiting catcher Roland. This spelled the loss for Trumpers had not the ball decided to clone itself and forcing Roland to walk in to Trumpers endzone only to see the ball he was carrying dissappear.
Amazingly Trumpers get away with tie and only a death.
This is what their coach had to say about this game : "The number isn't reflective, I've seen numbers of 2 TDs -- I actually saw a number of 3 TDs. Three. 1-1 as final score -- that is the biggest joke there is in this game. … The final score is probably 2-1, but I will tell you, I have some great advisors that will tell you it's a 4 -1 och even 5-1 and the highest I've heard so far is 7-1."
Trumpers, the unlikely underdog that insulted its way into the play offs! With a track record of 3 wins, 2 draws and 2 losses they have snatched the third place in group West. This means of course they are going to get a chance to get revenge on Atrocity Horrors that placed second on group East.
These two teams have a been at it ever since they encounter eachother last time. Specially their stars have had a continuously grudge!
AHs main star is of course none other than the werewolf Bernard de Cujo! Currently the top
scorer and top accomplished(total SSP) of this season! With 15 TDs under his belt this season only he has become a nightmare to all his opponents.
This is no ordinary Werewolf, fast as a gutter runner and agile as and elf. AND well skilled!
Trumpers that are notorious for not knowing how to wrestle or tackle anyone are going to have a really bad day with this player.
On the other hand the Trumpers have With E. Supre. The unmitigated sensation of this season! ON a shared second place as top scorer(Bernard de Cujo being on the very top) and second only to Bernard when it comes to accomplishements. This halfling has pushed the boundaries of what a fling can do! Fast enough to belong on a skaven team and a wizard with the ball, he is the Trumpers prefered ballhandler. The question is if that is enough to top Bernard from having its way with the ball.
Both teams have their share of prificient player: AH:
- Lupus G: Another fast werewolf, a good support for Bernard.
- Rex H: Team captain known for wanting to pile on his opponents.
- Khaleb: The real killer wight on the team.
- Willhelm: The notorious casualty machine is currently signed by AH.
Trumpers:
- The Wall : I don't care if you are a mexican werewolf or an islamic wight. This wall will stop you dead.
- The Swamp: Anytime someone tries to clear the Swamp he goes into a frenzied state and makes them regret it.
- Deeproot: This accomplished star together with The Wall and The Swamp are commonly known as the Trump Forest.
-Alt Right: Keep an eye on this fling. Promising nimble player able to land on even the hardest conditions.
On paper this looks like a clear win for the Horror but Trumpers ussually surprises when you least expect it. so the ruling is still out there.
A werewolfs pride, a gourmet chef and White E Supre.
The fall of the werewolves:
Eleven players against eleven player. No reserves on either team. Not the best outlook when you are flings. And yet, the first four turns pretty much dictated how the rest of the game would go.
Horrors first tactic was clearly to get The Swamp out of the way with Willhelm. I've never seen a werewolf wrestle down a tree before. It looked....messy. But both players were still in play. Despite the malfunctioning(sabotage suspected) Sprinkles Bernard had no problem getting the ball but stayed back to get his bearings. The clear winner of that first turn was Khaleb who barely touched a Mr Presidential and yet managed to send to the injury stand.
Trumpers response was simple. Foul Willhelm. And before anyone noticed what had happened Willhelm was in the injury stand. The ref looked like he was about to complain but after Cohen talked to him it seemed he calmed down.
Despite this being a big blow to AHs offensive capabilities they still had Khaleb. ANd once more he removed another player from this game.
We still don't understand what happened next. Bernard holding the ball decided to taunt The Wall. Sure, some zombies were keeping The Wall company, and sure he would have to go for it in order to reach Bernard. But we know that The Wall can and will break any tackle and it cannot resist the sight of a mexican Werewolf taunting him. The surprise on Bernards face when he realized the miscalculation he had just made was priceless.
Bernard was carried to the Knockout stand and didn't regained conciousness for the rest of the game.. Two turns two flings and two werewolves out of the game. this wal lookin ugly.
With the ball loose, With E. Supre runned trhough everything and picked the slippery ball up. Suddenly Trumpers had the initiative.
Is it a blur? ist it skaven? not its With E Supre with Khaleb on his heels.
Khaleb continued sending off players like there was no tomorrow and despite not hitting With E. Supre, he seemed to have infected the fling with undead fleas. Mr Supre look like he was having trouble moving past Horrors players but once again The Wall showed it can stop both mexicans and arabic terrorists. So with Khaleb out in the KO stand Supre was able to get the ball forward where Alt Right would ultimately bring it to score the first TD of the game.
0-1(3-3) to Trumpers favor.
The Walking Dead vs The Walking Forest
With both tacklers refusing to get in to play again, Horrors found themselves outstrenghed even if not outnumbered. So by moving before the offense were actually ready, Alt Right got the ball on Horros half and it looked grim. On paper Alt right is the perfect lander. And the Trumpers saw the perfect posibility to use that now. So it was with dissapointment when we saw fail the landing and dropping the ball.
By now the Tree Trio had been keeping the remaining undead player occupied so when the ghoul Gurl failed to pick up the ball so none other than With E. Supre picked it up and scored.
0-2(3-3)
One werewolf is all its needed.
The dissapointment of Gurls attempt to pick up the ball manifested itself in a rock thrown by the fans removing a zombie from play. Leaving the teams equal in numbers. The desperation of Horrors was palpable and with just a few turns left on the first half they needed to make it work.
So a perfect pick up by Gurl and a handoff to Lupis pretty much showed how everyone expected this game to have been from the very beginning. So scoring the 1-2 was a fact and Trumpers that had started to see themselves in the semis were suddenly worried again.
1-2(3-3)
The chef effect
As expected from a fling team, a chef was present. The aromas on the first half lay thick over the arena distracting undead and motivating flings. If possible the smell was even stronger during second half.
Trumpers starting with ball and with their key players still in play managed quite nicely to bring upp the ball. It was in an heroic fashion that Khaleb squeezed himself past two trees in order to tackle down With E. Supre. But today was not a good ballhandling day for Horrors and the fast With managed to pick up the ball once more and score.
1-3(5-6)
Its Mueller time
By now everyone had their eyes on With E. Supre. The most reliable guys in the field. This was maybe the reason why he was quickly targeted and sent out by Khaleb. But still having troublebs handling the ball led to the rise of an unlikely hero. the Collusion guy, Mr Mueller himself found the evidence he needed to take that ball to court. And he did with extreme without blinking.
1-4(5-6)
Soon after the whistle sounded the end of the game.
Never underestiate an walking forest and a fast fling.
