Blood Bowl Confessions

[rolo]

I was trying to make a leaguemate feel better about (an admittedly pretty stupid) error in a game, by telling him about some of the ways I've screwed up in 2+ decades of playing Blood Bowl both online and at a table.

Then I figured, if I'm baring my soul and looking like an idiot, I might as well do so to the whole world and look like a world-class idiot.

In my time, I have ...

... forgotten that it's the last turn of the game, and caged up instead of running in a game-winning touchdown.

... set up defense after giving up a touchdown instead of setting up offense.

... forgotten Regeneration on a Troll.

... forgotten Regeneration on a Tomb Guard.

... forgotten that Apothecaries can keep a KO player on the field.

... set up a normal offense instead of a one-turner, not realizing that it's turn 8 of the first half and not turn 1 of the second half.

... set up 10 players because I forgot to unpack all of my miniatures.

... set up 12 players because I forgot I'd bought a bench player.

... set up my ball carrier "safe" in a loose cage; so "loose" that the caging players' Tackle Zones didn't actually touch.

... forgot that Slann Biltzers have Diving Tackle.

... got my own players mixed up, picking up the ball with a Blitzer with Piling On instead of the Blitzer with Sure Hands and Dodge (costing me a reroll)
... compounded the previous error by using Piling On with the Ball Carrier (Blitz free, pow, stunned, "Would you like to use Piling On?", muscle memory in my hand clicked "Yes" just before what passes for my brain said "NOOOOOOOO......"

... accidentally fouled with my ball carrier as I was clicking a path around a fallen defender (Original Cyanide client)

... forgotten that if I score in turn 7 of my offense, my opponent has two turns and not one to equalize.

... gotten my opponent's players mixed up, thought the player I was blitzing out of the way didn't have Block, rolled Push/Both Down, chose BD. Then, instead of running in a sure TD, failed the next dodge which I shouldn't have had to take. Lost that (Semifinal!!) in OT. I'm still mad at myself.

... failed to realize how Take Root works, blitzed with a treeman, rooted, successfully stood up, should not have been allowed to finish the Blitz. I ended up losing that game, only later realizing that Nuffle struck me down for (accidentally!) cheating.

... (waaaay back in the day), failed to realize how the Hand-off action works, thought you could move a player next to the ball carrier, "take" a handoff, keep moving. In fairness that would be awesome.

... Using Setekh, blitzed an opposing ball carrier hoping to Strip the ball; rolled double both down. Forgot that he has Juggernaut and could have changed those to pushed, instead tried to reroll, got Loner'ed.

... Forgotten that I'd induced a wizard (many times)

... Forgotten that my opponent induced a wizard, bunched up in a nice, safe cage ... ...

... Forgot how fast my players were, ran forward and turtled up on turn 7 ... one square too short.


Go on and add to this list. Or just tell me what an idiot I am.
Real things that really happened only.

[Pipey]

I heard Schmee and Podfrey played three halves of blood bowl at CamDub. Losing track of turns is one thing, but whole halves?! Was still a draw I believe...

[sann0638]

Off the top of my head:
- took too few miniatures to Eurobowl
- set up 9 because 2 were sitting in the gap between dugouts where it was quite dark
- stood up one of his players on my turn then used him as an assist (lizard mirror)
- fallen asleep during a game
- said "watch this" for a funky chain push and then double skulled
- played almost a whole game thinking his (female) players were zons instead of counts as norse
- miscounted the squares to the endzone because the new dark elf pitch doesn't have an endzone
- caged up around the wrong player
- said "I'll receive" and then set up first, more times than I can remember
- forgot the weather (all the time)
- forgot which colour skill ring was which skill (too often)
- made my son cry by reminding him of how skills work

Hmm, that's a long list...

[lunchmoney]

Most of those I've done....
One that sticks in memory, though; getting a Ghoul, with the ball, safely away from every opponent player, on turn 15, and stopping 10 squares from the end zone.
Successfully turning a win into a draw.

[Pipey]

Once confidently surfed a witch elf in turn 1, to discover there was an imaginary dotted line a single square in from the sideline. Clearly not in fact the sideline at all! Welsh Open boards I think?

[rolo]

Oh yeah, just remembered:

- Set up a beautiful chain push to get a player into position to Break Tackle next to the ball carrier, Blitz, pow!!
Wasn't the ball carrier. Was a player with a ball as part of the base. Ball carrier was standing next to him, clearly marked with one of those UKTC coins.

[Wifflebat]

My favorite stupid play:

I move a Sidestep Norse runner heading down the sideline. Easy score next turn if he can stay on his feet. I run him up right along the sideline, until he's behind a blocker, also on the sideline, and one on his right, a square off the sideline. My opponent will get to blitz with assists, so I need to get him more some support. My other Norsemen are dodging like Elves. I dodge one, then another over to my runner. They've got a nice little cage around him.

So excited am I by my astonishing display of dodging that I try one more... success! I move him to the last adjacent square. The instant I turned play over to my opponent, I realized what I'd done. Unconcerned about the runner, who was of course safe because of his sidestep, and so excited by all my players dodging successfully, I had filled in every square around him, so my opponent had his pick of which of my cage Norse to hit to chain push him into the crowd.

I rarely dwell on my Blood Bowl mistakes, but that one made me seriously wonder what I was even doing playing this game.

[Wagz]

I once played as Dwarves

[straume]

I once made a lovely column defense only to learn that the columns were four squares from eachother. My opponent moved his entire cage through, doing quite a few gfis to get them all there. We both forgot it was a blizzard.

[Itchen Masack]

Playing as Goblins vs Lizards. 15 turns totally battered them off the pitch, scored and set up with 11 players (including 3 trolls) and my opponent had 1 solitary Skink in total.

Score was 1-1 so only way i could win was TTM or Blitz! Tried a deep kick. Touchback.

Skink ran through my team.

Turn 16 i failed to knock it over with 6 dice.

Lost 2-1

Thanks Mercyflush

[Glowworm]

Playing Flings against Lizards, opponents turn ends with a both down by his Krox on my tree, I set up a beautiful 4+ foul next turn only to be told the marker i had surrounded was actually my tree, not his Krox ( we were both using the same prone markers) as dice had been rolled & dodges made i asked the T.O ( the legendary Lunchmoney) if i could complete the action as i thought it would be funny........ yep, dead tree funny..... How we laughed






Played sober......

[Christy42]

Definitely the wizard one. My opponent reminded be about 3 times during the games asking why I didn't use it and I still forgot. After a few games it was why I converted a model.

I am horrid for forgetting my opponents can use gfi and suddenly my screen doesn't cover enough of the field.

I entirely forget I have break tackle. Then when I force myself to use it I end up forgetting the opponent has dt and I dodge into a tackle zone.

Fun fact if you forget your opponent has diving tackle.ypu will always roll a 6 and they will cry.

[firebreather]

Once confidently surfed a witch elf in turn 1, to discover there was an imaginary dotted line a single square in from the sideline. Clearly not in fact the sideline at all! Welsh Open boards I think?

I did that a few months ago on the welsh eurobowl pitch, apparently you cant roll for injury when the player hasn't left the field

[fallingdownjoe]

At Europen using those pitches I miscounted and ended up one square short to score. Definitely blaming the pitches there, not my own idiocy...

[rolo]

Induced Helmut Wulff, hoping to win the coin toss, choose offense, and foul with a chainsaw every turn until caught. Won the coin toss. Forgot to field Helmut. Brain remembered just as finger was clicking "End Setup".

The only possible explanation: I am an idiot. Fully sober at the time, playing from home while working from home.

(wound up having to field him for my opponent's 1-turn drive on turn 8. Successfully argued the call, had to field him on 2nd half defense. He fouled a Rat Ogre KO, got blitzed, knocked out, and ejected).

Please mock me relentlessly. I deserve no better.